After at least a dozen viewings of Peter Jackson films, I learned to stop hiding behind the big armchair whenever I spotted the orcs, a practice left over from early childhood when I was terrified by Smokey the Bear and his deep rumble of warning: 'Only YOU can prevent forest fires.'
But eventually I peeked out at the scenes of single combat. Sure these dudes were about as stupid as armor-plated slugs, but they looked strong, menacing, well-armed and above all, numerous and well-motivated.
Eventually I noticed something lost on my sons and, for that matter, all of the popular culture. Orcs are real wusses! They'd leap and lunge and deal mighty blows, but the victim was always a nearby tree trunk or a plinth of skulls, and never even a good guy let alone one of the heroes, not even the suspiciously-silvery 'elves' who always looked more like the footmen in Eyes Wide Shut.
For the purpose of sweet dreams, they'd work just fine. Far better than my provocative Frank Frazetta comforter.
When one thinks about the deeper implications of people raising kids who worship a dangerous, power-mad authoritarian, it explains all you need to know about the current sad state of our country. Of course, I'm talking about Walt Disney. Ha!
After at least a dozen viewings of Peter Jackson films, I learned to stop hiding behind the big armchair whenever I spotted the orcs, a practice left over from early childhood when I was terrified by Smokey the Bear and his deep rumble of warning: 'Only YOU can prevent forest fires.'
But eventually I peeked out at the scenes of single combat. Sure these dudes were about as stupid as armor-plated slugs, but they looked strong, menacing, well-armed and above all, numerous and well-motivated.
Eventually I noticed something lost on my sons and, for that matter, all of the popular culture. Orcs are real wusses! They'd leap and lunge and deal mighty blows, but the victim was always a nearby tree trunk or a plinth of skulls, and never even a good guy let alone one of the heroes, not even the suspiciously-silvery 'elves' who always looked more like the footmen in Eyes Wide Shut.
For the purpose of sweet dreams, they'd work just fine. Far better than my provocative Frank Frazetta comforter.
When one thinks about the deeper implications of people raising kids who worship a dangerous, power-mad authoritarian, it explains all you need to know about the current sad state of our country. Of course, I'm talking about Walt Disney. Ha!